This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
