bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize