In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Where did you get a picture of my penis
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
And then my night got REAL pukey
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
