I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
If I die, sorry about rent.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize