yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
