I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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