so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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