i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
