I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
