Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
