Don't you send me to vm
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
