she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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