3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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