Don't make out with my wife yet
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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