The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize
