it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize