Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
