have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
