chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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