I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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