Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize