Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
