North Korea, Best Korea!
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize