whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
