Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Are we still banned from the library?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
These tits shall not be calmed
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
