Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
My balls are so social today.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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