we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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