quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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