last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
