We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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