So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I forget how to act sober
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
