Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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