Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Sober January is a disaster.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I love you.
Bad choice
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
