in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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