I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
