You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
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