When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize