I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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