Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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