Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
