we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
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