yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Randomize
