sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
