I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
