Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
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