Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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