Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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