Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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