no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
