So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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